I just finished the rough draft of my indie film about a soldier. It's got potential, provided I can hit that potential. I like the characters. They're solid, individual, and fun to write. I like the twists and turns in the story, despite it being relatively simple. It's not an action-packed story, but I'm not working on an action-packed budget, so there. I've been thinking of how we're going to do the scenes we can on the budget we don't really have, and I've got ideas. And I haven't even spoken with the director/main producer about this. Either way, it sounds like we're making a god damn movie. He's all in, I'm all in enough to spend hours a day on this thing. It's happening. Now I'm just pouring time into editing, to ensure I can be finished by the end of September. I at LEAST want to be done with the flashbacks, so we have something to film in the summer. I can probably take my time a bit with the rest, as we're going to have a bit of real-world time lapse there.
And I've still got my Attila the Hun project on the back burner. I genuinely think the problem is twofold. First, I put so much effort into appeasing the readers that it kind of lost its sense of self. It lost a vital chunk of what it was because I was so eager to do what I could to ensure that someone saw it. Second, after the catastrophe that is Ben Hur, they won't make this movie with a gun to their heads. So I'll do one more pass, just to make it what I want it to be, then it goes quietly into my portfolio. And I go to more modern movies. Movies that cost less to make and tend to gross higher. *INFINITE SIGH* It really sucks to have to blame this on someone I've never even seen, but the fact is, Hollywood will avoid this movie like it's got face-chlamydia, simply because a similar movie did abysmally. But, that's the way their system works, and I've got to get used to it, because I cannot expect them to change everything to accommodate me. That's lead-paint-chips level dumb.
Also, I have yet to speak with Nate and Pam since they booted me from our joint-venture. I think the big reason is that Nate wanted a stoner roommate, and I refuse. I simply have too much to do to sit there and do nothing for a day, much less months or years. And the last time we hung out, we smoked a bit (so I could work out the issues in The Hun) and I thought I caught some bitchy subtext from him, basically telling me that I'm a college dropout who lives with his mother, so I should become a stoner. He's not wrong on the first two points. But just because I'm down, doesn't mean I'm out. I've spent the last three years learning a skill that pays well, obsessing over writing scripts. I've written ten of the suckers. It's not like I've been sitting around playing video games and getting fat. My figuring is that video games are fun, but ultimately useless. Somewhere out there is the best damn Goldeneye player that ever lived. And they have a skill that's been useless for twenty years. Why would I want that? Why be good at something that has no real world value? That person probably poured thousands of hours into that, and got exactly zero in return for it. With that in mind, why bother?
Also, on a related note, I'll probably be moving to Cheyenne, like I genuinely want to. And since I have a more flexible time table for this, I figure I can do it at my own pace. I'll work on getting my CNA worked out first, I'll save some cash, then I'll keep an eye open for pet friendly places within my price range. I know a guy in Cheyenne who works at a career placement center, so it'd be pretty easy. And my friends from Cheyenne told me that they'd be glad to have me. To be honest, I like Cheyenne infinitely more than Colorado. Colorado is becoming a hole, and Cheyenne is close enough to Fort Collins that I can still see my friends in the south, but not a crazy drive from Casper either, so I can see my friends in the north too. So, that's a plan. And it'll probably happen exactly like that too, because I don't change my fucking plan every week. It's hard to hit a moving target. Bah!
If nothing else, I figure this is proof that my last couple years have been good to me. Aurora was a shitheap. My whole life was crappy. Little money, little food, shitty apartment. It WAS a crucible, and it DID break me down to my core bits. I melted entirely, dumped the slag, and got pounded into whatever shape the powers that be wanted. And this time at home has been a quench. It was a nice period of mellow recuperation. This right here though is the tempering, I think. I'm working more hours than ever before, I'm dealt with people who consistently try (consciously or otherwise) to break me, and I'm holding my edge admirably. I had a bad night when that guy told me he hated my script, but nothing before or after that, and one bad day in a year is pretty good. There have been some bumps, some bruises, but nothing I can't handle.
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